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Licensed Psychologist

Perfectionism

Most of us would consider having high standards a good thing. It reflects ambition and a desire for success. The perfectionist, however, sets unrealistically high standards that often cannot be met, can rob him of personal satisfaction, and can actually interfere with success. Most perfectionists learned early in life that they were valued by how much they achieved. For them, life was an endless report card. Instead of developing their own inner self worth, they learned to value themselves on the basis of other people's approval.

The truth is that no one succeeds at becoming "just right," free of flaws and failings. Growth is a lifelong process and criticizing ourselves just slows it down and keeps us unhappy. Balancing honest appraisal with self acceptance each day can open up possibilities for change without shame and negativity.

I would like to share some interesting quotations on this subject.

"Perfectionism is self-abuse of the highest order."
Anne Wilson Schaef

"It is failure that guides evolution; perfection provides no incentive for improvement, and nothing is perfect."
Colson Whitehead, The Intuitionist

"When you stop expecting people to be perfect, you can like them for who they are."
Donald Miller, A Million Miles in a Thousand Years: What I Learned While Editing My Life

"Perfection is not a destination; it's a never-ending process...Enjoy!"
Jim Bouchard, Think Like a Black Belt

"Stop waiting for the perfect day or the perfect moment... Take THIS day, THIS moment and lead it to perfection."
Steve Maraboli, Unapologetically You: Reflections on Life and the Human Experience

The Smile

In this fast paced world, we often drive ourselves too hard, forget to take time out for ourselves and can become depressed. Did you know that the simple act of smiling can actually help lift feelings of depression. As a test, try standing in front of a mirror and smiling at yourself for 8 minutes. The effect will surprise you. Scientific evidence demonstrates that the facial changes involved in smiling have direct effects on chemical changes in the left frontal cortex of the brain associated with happiness. Researchers found that even when people mimicked a smile, or were not aware that they were smiling, endorphins were released that slowed down the heart rate and reduced stress. In addition, they discovered that people who smile have a real positive effect on others. In this case, mirror neurons fire in the brain and evoke a similar neural response as if the observer was smiling himself. So take time out to relax, and smile. Let this mind-body connection nourish you and the people around you.

Welcome

From time-to-time I come upon interesting and inspirational information that can nourish your mind, body and spirit. I would like to share them with those of you who are like-minded and will be posting on a regular basis. If you would like to be added to my emailing list, please fill out the form you can find on the right side of the About or Contact pages. I believe you will find my Insights meaningful. I hope you will chose to share them with your friends and invite them to also join my Mind - Body - Spirit Insights mailing list.
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